I heard a quote once

|| Sometimes a forest must be completely burnt down in order to promote new growth.

I am here.

I've never been in such a place where old structures have been completely crumbling right before my eyes, but not without new, miraculous ones rising furiously. He called me into his study today. My grandfather. '' I just wanted to see where you were at with all of this''. I had to hold back tears. He had been such an ass lately, ripping me apart and taking the most low lying blows. But I understood. None of us want to go thru this. We were all scared, and we've just been taking it out on each other. ''I'll be okay, I've got some options''. The reality is that I've been flying terrified, by the seat of my pants. I have no idea and I'm not sure what's going to happen. But that's not the space that I want to be in. We can't do anything there. It's here, in the calmness of the storm that we can make that headway. That deep-seeded faith that it will all work out. I've fought for years to honor that feeling. That internal compass, that gut faith that all will unfold exactly when it needs to.

This is where you fall back.